


Bonding

by MachiMaquiaveli



Category: humans are space orcs - Fandom
Genre: Aliens, Humans, Humans Are Weird, Original work - Freeform, humans are space Australia, humans are space oddities
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-04
Updated: 2020-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:55:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23017363
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MachiMaquiaveli/pseuds/MachiMaquiaveli
Summary: Commandeer Da’g wants to take advantage of the humans bonds, xer doesn't understand how quickly (and weird) their bonds works.
Kudos: 106





	Bonding

**Author's Note:**

> Helloooo, this is my new obsesion! Humans are space orcs and I find it hilarious.

Commandeer Da’g of the Kroar planet puffed proudly; xer company had been chosen to be one of the first to be allowed to have human soldiers on their ship. It was an honor since humanity had been only recently accepted into the Intergalactic Federation and not many had been actually aloud to contact the humans; less work along with them. Commandeer Da’g couldn’t wait to experience their legendary wild manners and fighting skills first hand. 

Admiral Hi’g, principal chairman of the human-alien board team and diplomat looked at xer.

“You sure about this? Humans tend to show little appreciation for discipline and/or any kind of authoritative figure.”

“I know, I’ve heard the stories,” Da’g answered unaltered. “But I also know this is a great opportunity for our people. I think we can mutually help each other much and I heard humans tend to be generous with their allies.”

“That’s if properly bonded first.” Hi’g corrected xer.

“Yeah, but, humans bond easily, right?” Da’g chuckled.

“You have no idea.”

Maybe commander Da’g should have been concerned about the last comment and the strange hint in xeir superior but xer though nothing of it since xer was too eager to work with humans and improve xer value in the military ranks.

*************

“OH MY GOSH! Mark! Look at this cutie!” Yelled one of the humans.

“AHHHHHHHHHH! Sasha! My love! This is so cute!” 

Commandeer Da’g couldn’t believe what xer was watching.

“What are you doing? That’s not cute! That’s an arakchroid, a hunter!” Xer yelled at the humans under xer command.

“But look at those beeeeautiful colors!” Said human Sasha.

“Those colors are to warn you they are poisonous!”

“Can we keep it?” Asked human Mark.

“What? No!”

“C’mon! Look at them! They only have five legs, how tough you have to be to survive with three limbs missing?” Human Mark insisted. “Pretty pleeeeeeease?”

“Pretty please?” Repeated Human Sasha.

“For the last time, no.” The commander was on xer last nerves.

“But I want it!!!!”

“One thousand times no. We already have to deal with three of your earth “pets” not to mention all the stuff you brought on our last trip to Xenor.”

“It’s not stuff, its friends!” Human Sasha complained.

“A waste rock is a friend?”

“Duh, obvious.”

“Sasha, look! I found something even cooler than the spider!” Human Mark interrupted.

“What’s it?” They asked

“A KITTY!”

“That’s it! I have had enough! Someone call the admiral, I want to resign from this mission immediately.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you like it! Remember I live for comments, tahnk you. Have a nice day :`*


End file.
